On Presence

What is it I strive to be if not honest and present in mind, body and emotion?  It is not that I must act on my thoughts and desires.  I must only acknowledge that they exist. So too, I needn’t share all of my inner experiences, these are intimate parts of me, intimate details that I want to be judicious in sharing.  After all,  what is the most precious gift I have to give, if not myself? So then, I ought take care with whom I share the gift of myself.  Vetting is a wise action when considering placing something valuable into another's care. 

How then, do I go about the process of vetting? How do I determine what is and is not appropriate to share and when?  Do I determine this based on your behavior, on what it communicates to me is appropriate?  Certainly not!  Yet this I have done as though I were a mere image of you! It is I who must determine, with the guidance of my higher power, what is and is not appropriate to share of myself.  I must not share for the mere purpose of holding your interest or out of fear that should I not, you will turn your attention elsewhere.  

I cannot rely on myself however to remain pure in action and intent.  I must rely on my higher power and awareness practice to hold my ego in check, to keep me from falling into my old beguiling ways, to replace these with new responses and to keep the end goal at the forefront of my mind no matter what my heart and body desire.   What are they but impetuous children, always wanting and craving, who no sooner obtain the desired object then become wanting for something more.  

Lastly, what of communication?  We for the sake of ease, fall into the trap of text messaging as what seems to be the main source of communication these days.  Are we not using this format as a shield, as a way to keep others at arms length, as a way to obscure what we really mean or feel?  Without the nuances of body language, tone and intensity of voice we do ourselves a disservice when we communicate in this forum.  I want to experience and be experienced in the fullness of presence, not just as text on a screen.  I want to bring to you my practice of presence.  Will you bring me yours?